Austin City Limits Festival

ACL = asthma


I spent the weekend doing this giant music festival in Austin known as ACL. I saw many great bands. Overall I did not like it. The dust and allergies causing me horrible asthma making it hard just to breath played a huge part in that. I loved having friends over from out of town, but the house is trashed so I feel bad about that. This place is quite dirty and I have a hard time finding the time to clean it all. Most things need cleaning literally about 10 times as often as my old apartment.


I wonder why I've felt so lonely this year. So many great things are going on in my life, but I think I have this long-term expectation that I'll always be alone. That I'm not capable of making a lasting relationship with someone I find worthwhile.


But ACL is an amazing music event. I think I prefer small venues to large ones though. I am often disappointed by large concerts. I guess it's not my thing. The sound quality wasn't great to me, but it's hard to judge when I could hardly breath.


It's always nice to see all the Austinites though. I'm glad I've now experienced the chaos of ACL. That was a TON of people stomping up some major dust storms. There were gorgeous people everywhere. It was very hot too. I am sunburned.

Ghostriding the Whip

Life is easy...

That's a weird thought to have while shooting a gap between cars on the freeway at 95mph. But still, life for me has been pretty easy.


I hate that's it's not always so obvious, but I was awaiting some awesome friends at Flying Saucer earlier this afternoon wondering whether I should feel bored or lonely when it occurred to me that it was pretty incredible to have the money and free time to be sipping a nice beer awaiting some amazing friends for trivia night.

During the insanely fast drive home I had to admit that I am extremely happy with my life. I friggin' love Austin and the people that I know here. Adrenaline is way better than beer. The high from dodgeball is incredible and I will miss it in the weeks until next season. It fills me with so much energy.

In my head all of this is some kind of lead-up to the fact that dating is NOT easy. That despite how simple school, making money, throwing parties, finding things to do, etc. are... dating eludes me. I was at a couple bars tonight and I saw many couples and many people who hit on each other. I heard some stories and noticed patterns among people. They didn't match my expectations. They never do.


I don't get the whole thing. I know some fat, ugly guys that only date extremely hot women. Anywho, given how easy everything else in life is for me, I have this tendency to just assume I'm hideous or have some horrible personality trait that nobody will tell me about. I don't have another explanation for why dating is so difficult for me. I've asked about the personality a ton, so I'm going with hideous.

Man, this trailed off... there was so much to write, but I am le tired. It's not a good way to end it. So over-dramatic. I dated someone I liked a few weeks and it ended so my thoughts strayed back to my problems dating.

ACL this weekend. Good times. I am ready for ze bands and seeing friends and crazy crowds. Woo-hoo!

Hmm

Not dating anyone now. But there's a big party tonight! So maybe there's hope for someone new. Either way that year of no real dating is over. I'm happy about that. And I was happy with it while it lasted. Didn't have any feeling of compromise on my part or any signs that I was attracted to the wrong kind of person.


So that's sad news. I don't know what I could have done differently, but maybe we just didn't click for her. So now I clean up the house, fill the keg, hang the pinata and invite people over to jump in the bouncy house.

Smitten

I'm dating someone. How novel. It had been a long time. Normally on dates I'm full of doubts and wondering if I like the person, but I'm glad I was so patient and picky now. I don't have those doubts this time. (I'm looking for images for this blog, but trying to avoid being sappy or romantic... hence this being a short post. This is tough.)


It's interesting. We mostly see each other hanging out with the groups of friends and go to parties at nights. It's nice to be able to share that with someone and nice that we have so many of the same friends. When we're alone we don't say much. We just lay around enjoying the chemistry.


Not much else is new in my life. Adding that to my schedule pretty much fills up my time. Now I'm going to watch some college football and work out. Maybe clean some. Then off to more parties I'm sure, though I don't yet know which ones. A hurricane approaches. Everyone's exaggerating how bad it is and now football games are canceled. Oh well.

Let The Good Times Roll

The year streak is broken. It's still early and I don't know her extremely well, but I'm excited to be "dating" or whatever this is. I'd talk more about it, but I hate to start putting labels to something that's so ambiguous right now. So, once I know more I'll update.


There's a potential for drama. Blah! I have this tendency to just want to shout everything in my life all the time. I think it's great to just let it all out, but others don't and it's caused problems before so I'll bite my tongue and wait until things are already out in the open. In the meantime I have parties and plans every night. I have a hard time finding time to do laundry, much less blog. I shall try to do better. ;-)